I’ve huffed and puffed about this topic before, and to be honest, I don’t know why I even bother readdressing it, men will always be perverts, but what I don’t understand is why anyone thinks perverted messages are acceptable to send online?In the past week I have received a handful of sick, sick, scary, sick messages. Jaw dropping, vulgar, nasty messages. You guys need to get a grip on your Facebook advances.

So many guys use Facebook and other social sites to date off of, and fine do what you want, but sending gross/weird messages is absolutely pointless. I show my friends, we laugh and then I block you. Do you do it for shock value? Spaghetti theory? Some skank will bite? I don’t get the point.

With that being said, I figured I’d send you creeps some helpful info on how what NOT to do online.

1. Do not send me generic, bragging messages. So you’re rich, wanna spoil me, take me shopping, fly me all over etc. bla bla gag. You don’t think that’s weird? You just wanna fly a stranger all over the world? Just walk around the mall taking sugar baby shopping? Desperattttttte. And ya, I bet I’m the first girl you ever sent that message to right? Creepy, wait no terrifying and most def. not genuine. Plus no one likes a bragger. So you’re rich? Ya, rich and scary.

2. Fix your weirdo pics. Pictures from 1980 when you were hot, dirty bathroom pics, blurry pics, pictures cropped weird, those tiny pics people post bc they don’t know how to properly upload (Either you’re not smart or just way too old), pictures with piles of junk in the background, overly photoshopped pics, pics with a different random girl in every pic, we know your type “Hey can I get a pic for my friend back home, he’d never believe I’m here!!” yeah yeah. It’s 2010 and you’re lurking around the net, you need a camera and some normal friends to take pictures with. Successful lurkers have cameras, clean houses and friends they can take pics with, oh and know how to crop.

3. In a Relationship Status? Why are you messaging me? I always love going through my roommates friend requests, because they always have one friend in common with these weird guys, and it’s always me. Hehehehe woops. Anyway, the other day we clicked on one guy and I couldn’t even believe it, it said Married to Patty Smith or whatever. I got so mad! Poor Patty has no idea her sick husband is adding young floozies like me and my roommates on Facebook. That’s cheating. If you’re in a relationship or even worse, married, why are you adding younger, cute girls online? That’s called opening doors and you’re the last fool anyone wants to talk to. Appreciate Patty before I email her telling her what a creep you are. If Patty left you you’d fall apart and die so why don’t you get off Facebook and go give her a kiss. So over men not appreciating their women and using social sites to fantasize about other girls. My roommates and I will never like you. Get off the computer.

4. Dating out of your league. This is probably the biggest problem I see online. I get soooo many messages from guys that could be my Dad! Huhhhhhh. You’re 50. Im 26. You’ve been married. You have grey hair. You have 3 kids, with 3 ex wives. WHY would I want to talk to you? I mean c’mon, seriously. I think some guys forget how old they are and think they’re still 25, hot, and single with no baggage. Realize no girl my age will want to talk to you. I don’t at least. I don’t care if you’re a billionaire, all that baggage + ex wives + kids + way too old = game over.

So with all that being sad, take a few nice pictures with your most normal friends, stop sending every hot girl a duplicate message online, stop bragging, stop dating out of your league, and never ever send creepy, perverted messages. Your only hope at ever talking to a girl online is being respectful, genuine and polite. You also must remember 95% of girls online aren’t looking for dates like you are, and even less 99.9999% are just looking to F. Facebook is not a dating/hook up site for normal people, so don’t be mad if you don’t get a reply.

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