Adam does Vegas

6/28-6/30/09

Day 1-

This story begins in the San Diego airport at 9am on a Sunday.  I’m on my way to Vegas for my best friend’s bachelor party, so me and a 3^rd high school friend, whom we’ll call Junior, met the Bachelor in the airport bar.  We start the trip off with whiskey shots and tall beers, and upon boarding the plane we find out the drink special is $4 Jack and gingers, so we have 3 each.  It was already a promising trip with the only thing floating in my stomach being 4 shots of whiskey and a large beer.

Click to read all about Adam’s new found confidence in Vegas!

There was either something in the drinks, or the Vegas air, but normal Adam forgot his shyness at the baggage claim, and Vegas Adam came to play.  Perhaps I felt it my duty as Best Man, but for whatever reason, I took it upon myself to be party liaison, and recruiter of all things female for the group of 16 guys.  We spent the first day at the pool while we were waiting for our rooms to be ready.  During this time we continued to get drunk, and hang out in the lazy river.  The only girls worth mentioning this day were three Canadians: Krista, Allison, and umm… yeah, guess the third wasn’t that memorable.  The girls were fun, and told us to join them at Body English that night, and I told them it was a possibility.  At the same time, my friend K-Ball was in town celebrating her birthday with 5 girlfriends, and they told us they were going to the new club XS at Encore and that we should go there.  Through them, we booked a VIP table at what we found out was a poolside event, and every guest had the option of getting in the pool.  A few hours later we were in the club, bottle service ready to go, and everyone ready for a good time.  I don’t think most people realized you could actually get IN the pool, as most didn’t.  However there were a few brave souls willing to swim around for everyone else’s entertainment.  The club provided a few beach balls which of course everyone took the opportunity to smash around and play makeshift games of volleyball.  Across the pool I spotted an attractive girl, so I did what anyone would do; I batted one of the balls across the pool and hit her in the face.  I instantly saw the excitement in her eyes as the ball bounced off her mug, and her friends pointed and laughed.  Naturally, she swam over and introduced herself- girls are funny like that.

Kaylee was from the bay area and flew out to Vegas and join up with some of her friends that drove out from San Diego.  After chatting a bit more, Kaylee asked if I wanted to get out of the pool and get a drink with her.  “We have some alcohol right here if you want to make something”, I said.  Dumb, I know, but luckily she gave me another chance- “No, I really think we should walk around and go to up to the bar”.  This time I accepted her offer, and we walked off together, with 15 single guys hooting behind me.  Thanks, asses.  We walked around for a bit until we found a dark, secluded corner where we “hung out” for a while.  And now that I think about it, we never did make it to the bar but I guess no one noticed we returned empty handed, or would have been let down if we hadn’t.  Around 3 in the morning, her friends were ready to leave so they took off, and that was the last I heard of her.

Day 2-

We get up around 10am, head to Diablo’s restaurant to say hi to some friends and start the morning off with Jager bombs and beers.  Actually, I was the only one starting the morning off that way, but someone has to.  Then we cram some Monte Carlo buffet food in our stomachs, and head back to the pool.  The pool wasn’t looking that promising, as it was still early, and a Monday.  Slowly, the lazy river started to come back to life.  Cousin P brought a football down with him that he got from who knows where, and he would float around to the other side of the river and I would hit him with a pass.  This worked about three times, and then I alligator armed the fourth throw and it hit some guy in the face.  This guy was a royal douche bag, and definitely deserved/enjoyed being hit in the face with balls, repeatedly.  He exploded and screamed at me, “YOU THINK THAT’S FUNNY?!?!” as I continued laughing.  By the time he made it around the river, he glared but wouldn’t say anything to me.  I hope he picked up syphilis from a hooker that weekend.

Eventually, a group of girls sharing one flotation ring and an Icee came by.  I figured this Icee was a good conversation piece so I said, “hey where did you get that, I’ll trade you for a beer!”  One girl held out the Icee and swapped me.  On their next pass, I grabbed on to the inter tube and took a lap with them around the river.  A few of them were 21, the rest were not quite there yet.  I didn’t take any more laps with them.  Then, Canada returned.  Allison was looking hot in a green bikini, because some Canucks do care what they look like.  Although that might be offensive to them, as all three girls were Oilers fans.  We recounted the previous night’s actions, and the girls gave me a hard time about not bringing the bachelor party to Body English.  I gave them a hard time about being from Canada.  I found out they had never been to San Diego, and was quick to offer them a place to stay if they wanted to come visit.  Quite a long shot I know, but it can never hurt to try.  When the guys were ready to get out of the pool, they gave me praise for being “that guy”, and I sarcastically thanked all of them for not providing me any wing-man support the entire weekend.

I could continue about the most amazing dinner that night at Bobby Flay’s restaurant, the bars/casinos we ventured to after, my 10 mandarin bombs, nearly getting tossed out of Planet Hollywood, hooker encounters, a human beat box singing Metallica to me at 4am on the sidewalk, or the after party in the Bachelor’s suite that lasted until the sun came up.  But all that really wouldn’t interest you.  However I had a breakthrough, and I can only hope this new found confidence continues back in San Diego.

A

*Note to Adam- that story wasn’t nearly juicy enough for you being in VEGAS! All you did was float one lap in a lazy river with a chick! Step it up!

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